Are the People Around You Keeping You Unhappy, Off Track,
and in Fear?
"It happens." I say those words fairly often.
When someone starts telling me about the awful thing they
recently experienced, or the bad behavior of their boss or
spouse, or some other dismal tale that has left them unhappy,
my only response is to simply say, "It happens."
No need to get upset, worry, agonize, brood, obsess, seek
vengeance or retaliation. A person just needs to realize that
things happen. Getting stuck on those things only keeps you
firmly planted in the past with regret, anger, fear, and sadness
taking center stage. And happiness no where to be found.
To create a positive future, you have to be living fully
in the now. And these "bad" things from the past
can't be center stage in your mind.
But what if this person with the icky attitude is someone
very close to you?
What if they are always unhappy, often say derogatory things,
or act in ways that are unkind? Or, they come across as very
kind and thoughtful, sweet even, and then suddenly have bursts
of something completely different - something selfish, hostile,
manipulative and immature? Spending time with these people
causes you to live in a perpetual state of oppression without
even knowing it. Unhappy people are like rain on your parade.
You simply can't have them around and maintain a happy, healthy,
positive outlook. It is impossible.
This is just what is happening on the surface. Here I am
only talking about how their bad or unpleasant attitude is
negatively affecting you.
I haven't even mentioned what is happening energetically.
And that is by far the most significant, and potentially dangerous,
Unhappy people are usually energy vampires. They latch onto
and literally suck the very life force out of those people
who are high vibration, happy, and healthy.
They do it with energetic cords. They do it with their unkind
words. They do it by throwing energy darts of negative thought
into your energy field. They do it when they look into your
eyes and tap into your soul.
You simply can't have these people near you for any length
And it is so easy to know.
How do you feel after you have spent time with them or had
a conversation with them on the phone?
Do you feel drained or do you feel uplifted?
With the positive people in your life, what I call your real
"soul" family, you will always feel better, happier,
appreciated, blessed by having spent time with them. They
make you smile.
An energy vampire will have the opposite effect. You will
feel drained, depressed, or confused. Being around someone
running this weird energy causes chaos and confusion. And
it can literally ruin your life.
Unfortunately, I have a great deal of experience with this
and can talk about it first hand. I was intimately involved
with a guy that does this. I have also been in a business
partnership with a woman who was an energy vampire.
For over a year I lived in a perpetual state of confusion.
I began to doubt myself and my own inner wisdom. I went from
vibrant, happy, thriving, and successful, to struggle, failing
health, and significantly low self esteem. And from that place
I made poor decisions and was unable to manifest my desires.
It took years to climb out of the darkness her influence caused.
Was I a victim?
Living through it and learning from it, I have gained a depth
of knowledge far beyond anything I could have learned any
It happens - like so many other unpleasant things in life.
And despite what their intentions are, whether they are consciously
sucking energy or are completely unaware, they are just like
everyone else. They are doing the best they can under the
circumstances. They don't know any better. They are unhappy
and desperately seeking a way to feel better. So there is
no need to blame them. But I do recommend that you avoid them.
It is exceedingly difficult to gage this with people you
see everyday - particularly a romantic or marriage partner.
Every intimate encounter involves energy exchange and energetic
cording. So there is nothing casual about "casual s__."
You take on their energy. They take on yours. You begin operating
under their set of beliefs, fears, judgments, and expectations.
This phenomena often affects women significantly more than
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||Debbie "Takara" Shelor is a #1 bestselling author, award-winning transformational speaker, engineer, and consultant. She provides tools, training, and support to authors, teachers, coaches, group leaders, and other individuals who are tired of feeling stuck and are ready to catapult themselves and their clients into high gear both personally and professionally. She acts as a catalyst of radical positive change for both individuals and organizations. She is the creator of Dancing
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